Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Hellos & Goodbyes


Today was a day of hellos and goodbyes.
I got to see some dear friends for dinner (and lunch!) today, people I've been wanting to see for a while. Last time we met up was 10 months ago (thanks for taking the time to meet up with me).
Then, rushed off for another meeting with another bunch of friends.
It was fun, just talking and enjoying each other's company. However, this was a farewell of sorts for me too, for I knew I wouldn't be seeing them again for a year.
We talked about why it doesn't become easy. Even after 8 years. How do I even begin to explain this to people who have never been away for so long? For me, perhaps fear of change is a factor. Something always feels or looks different each time I return. The roads. Family. Friends. New baby. New car. Death. Emigration. You never quite know what you're saying goodbye to each time you leave. CC and I were talking about the topic of goodbyes over lunch too. How it can be difficult in life to make good friends, the type you call platonic soulmates, and then have to say farewell. Almost makes it not very worth it, doesn't it? But I suppose one can't go through life hiding, to prevent ourselves from going through the pain of separating.
You also leave behind a familiar culture. I'll have to revert back to speaking proper English. Perhaps even with a Minnesotan touch to it (Uff-Da!). I'll have to make do with Mix Fm online to hear our local accents. Leave behind family and friends who have learnt to read you like a book. Leave behind people who share your skin colour. Who look like you.
You change gears again. When's my next presentation? What about that abstract? Next clinic day. Next oncall. Need to check up on that patient post-radioiodine ablation. Or that postop lady.
Back to the daily grind. Back to my reality. I can't imagine why people would want to watch medical dramas on TV just to be a part of it.