Irony

Irony

i·ro·ny n. An expression or utterance marked by a deliberate contrast between apparent and intended meaning.

Example: Obese woman coming to the Diabetes Clinic, BMI* (Body Mass Index) of 40, chairman of a chocolate company, hemoglobin A1c 8.6%, who doesn't exercise, drinks 2 cans of regular Coke daily, and comes in wearing a T-shirt with the words 'It's Candy Time!'

I tried to keep a straight face. Until I got to her chest to listen to her heart with my stethoscope. And saw the words on her shirt. We shot each other a look, became red in the face, and just burst out laughing. She had forgotten today's appointment was with the endocrinologist, and had worn that shirt.

Example of what not to do (kinda like being caught for speeding while wearing a shirt that says "Save the Doughnuts. Shoot the Cops" )

*BMI: Weight in kg/(height in meters)²

25-29: Overweight

>30: Obese

Along those lines, kinda amused by the issue of the lack of sugar in Malaysia. Some politicians have even stooped as low as to sell sugar to the public to reassure us cane sugar is aplenty (cheap PR stunt if you ask me). As many has pointed out, this reflects our taste buds' love affair with all that is sweet. The Almighty Lord Glucose.

All Hail.

That's a fact: Malaysians as a whole (and this is where I fully pledge my allegiance) have a sucky lifestyle. We hate to exercise. I can count with one hand the number of friends I know who exercise regularly to stay fit (EXERCISE= NOT five push ups a day!). People my age with huge beer bellies (myself included). My own family fools itself into thinking drinking lots of sweet guava/orange/apple juice is good, because 'it's just fruits' and is good for you (yea, with all that added glucose).

We love to eat ourselves to death. I still fondly remember the milo-ais at Siang Malam, my favourite mamak haunt; the secret to a good drink is to have an inch of condensed milk and an inch of milo at the bottom of the glass. You could float a spoon on it.

They say you can't get high from mamak foods, unlike the evils of an orange spiked vodka lime of bars. Well, the sugar high you get from the mamak drinks is probably worse. I bet people were running blood glucoses of over 400 mg/dL. Like the surgeon general's warning that comes on the cigarette packs, there should be something similar on the glasses:

Warning.

The sugar content in this drink will likely make you bounce off walls.

We could give Starbucks a run for its money.

But really. Maybe the truth should be told. There is absolutely nothing wrong with excess glucose. Glucose is energy. Sweetness is good. Sugar is good. A bad diet, lack of exercise, do not cause diabetes. In fact, there is no such thing as diabetes. And this is not a pathetic attempt by an endocrinologist to ensure job security.