The Race Ride

Can't. Feel. My. Legs.

The biking was awesome. Couldn't have asked for a better day; sunny clear blue skies, not a cloud in the sky. It had rained last year.
Overall, just under a hundred people, raising over $20,000.
In the typical Malaysian kiasu-ism, although this wasn't a race, I was zipping past people, or impatiently waiting behind roadhoggers fellow cyclists until I could pass. Must. Finish. First. And I did, though no one except me was keeping count. 51.5 km of cycling through southeast Minnesota, taking us from the city to the outskirts to rural roads to farmlands and back.

Km 0-10: (This is a cinch. Maybe I should have signed up for the 50 mile ride instead of the 32.)
Km 11-20: (KNCCB. What can't that person ride faster? Dang it I'm gonna overtake)
Km 21-30: Thighs and back start to ache.
Km 31-35 uphill: Butt muscles start to twitch and threaten to cramp. And no, this was not from what I ate last night.
Km 36-40: (Gaah. What is that smell?? Oh. Manure)
Km 41-45: Starts hallucinating. Sees recurring images of a cool, lush desert wadi. With a char kuey teow stall beside it. And a Heineken van.
Km 46- Finish: (Gotta be number one. Gotta be number one. Gotta be number one) (And I think I did finish number one in my group. Though this wasn't a race)

Total distance: 51.5 kilometers. Total time: 2 hours 4 seconds.

I gotta say I was disappointed that all we got at the finish line were two elderly people on lawnchairs ringing their bells to welcome me back (Bless their hearts. They volunteered, after all). True, there was a big organizer's hut and volunteers and even the local radio station people. But, where was the ribbon through which I ride? The cheerleaders with their pompoms (one of the 60-year old ladies did wave her pompom at me I guess)? The mayor with a medal for me? Publishers with their book deals for me. Mothers with their daughters and marriage proposals in tow??
I bet Lance Armstrong would never have put up with this.
Okay, that last part was a joke. This was a great, no, AWESOME day. A day when people got together to raise funds for a good cause. And you, my readers, contributed so generously (thank you, really) though I did have my doubts about your motives (to help diabetics, or to see me topless?).
A promise is a promise, and since I exceeded my goal of $200, you get a topless picture (just remember to throw up into the toilet, and not your keyboard).