You Know You're Back in Malaysia When:

• You see that Chinese uncle with loudly sucking at his teeth, with a toothpick in his mouth
• There is absolutely no sense of order as everyone just shoves to get on the Aerotrain at KLIA
• You see cars zipping past you eventhough you're already going at 120 km/h
• Cars are parked illegally, then double-parked, and clogging up the roads
• The foodstalls are still crowded at 12:30 AM, with people and stray dogs
• You see all manners of modified cars sporting decals of equipment they clearly do NOT carry (I'm not sure why having a DOHC sticker on a clunker of a car does anything)
• You get your first case of travellers' diarrhea only 14 hours into your visit
• Your buttcrack feels sticky again just 2 mins after your shower (and no, it's not from the diarrhea)
• After a meal, all you have to do to get the bill is to use the usual pen-writing-in-the-air gesture or circle your index finger. The last time I did that in the USA the waiter brought me another cup of coffee.
• Suddenly it doesn't feel out of place to say Aiyah, Alamak, or KNNCCB (well, maybe it should be for this one)

Not that I'm dissing Malaysia/Malaysians or anything like that, it's just that I'm guilty of many of the above (ask my wife, she'll tell you I do Number 1 very well). Also there's something very comforting to be back in the midst of such familiarity. Ah, it's nice to be back.