Saturday, November 25, 2006

The Procedure

We're having our (belated) Thanksgiving dinner party tonight, to be hosted by HH, our cardiologist friend from Singapore. This year, they let me prepare the turkey. A 10 kg turkey. Big mistake. Never. Ever. Let a crazy endocrinologist prepare the bird. Especially one armed with an 18-gauge needle, syringe and some crazy homemade marinade. It's sitting in the brine right now; stay tuned for the end results. You'll probably read about it in the newspapers.

"22 Foreign Doctors and Family Admitted with Acute Gastroenteritis"

Addendum: I know this sounds like I'm boasting, but I swear the bird was the juiciest, tastiest turkey evar! All (almost) 10 kgs devoured by the ravenous indigenous tribe of the Singapolaysians. No mercy was shown.
Brine (to soak bird in):
2 liters water
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup salt
2 tablespoons each of black peppercorn, allspice berries, crystallized ginger (mashed to a pulp)

Soak bird for 12 hours. If you have sadist tendencies, feel free to inject some of that brine into the breast with an 18G needle. Brine 30 mL IM prn.

When ready to roast, make deep 2 cm incisions/stabs around the breast and thigh and shove in garlic and/or raisins. Baste generously with butter. Place breast side DOWN (keeps breast from drying out). Place 4x6 inch pieces of foil on back, thigh to prevent burning. Add pieces of sliced pineapples on top. Roast for 4-5 hours, until 180 °F (with meat thermometer, or used rectal thermometer) in thigh. Baste with butter every 45 mins.
Serve. And be prepared to feel like a God when your humble vassals feed upon your heavenly fowl. Be forewarned: head swelling is expected.