Wednesday, March 15, 2006

S-T-U-P-I-D

I AM SO STUPID
S-T-U-P-I-D
At the risk of my friends and family reading this (ah, what the heck, I'm a 29 and I'm a doctor. I'll talk about sex when I feel like it, thank you very much!), I'll share this one regret I have. I just have to get this off my chest.
So when I was a medstudent in Canada, a nursing student lived in my dormitory for a couple of months. For some reason she liked to hang out with me, despite us having different cultures and interests (she's caucasian). I think it was because she found my innocence and niceness refreshing. I wasn't trying to get her drunk and get into her pants like many of the people there.
She liked to come to my room and talk. Just talk. About interests. About family. And often I just listened. Made her dinner a couple of times.
While she wasn't a bombshell, she was pretty. With a full, ahem, rack. And aside from a wild nightlife many students have, she was a nice, sweet girl.
So one day, while I was trying to study and she was talking about her sexual preferences, she asked me if I'd like to see her breasts. Literally.
To this day, I regret my answer.
"No, thanks."
ARGGHHH!!!! Okay, before all you guys out there start taking out your baseball bats and pummel my head, I admit, that was dumb.

And no, I wasn't being righteous or anything. Just that being in a culture I wasn't familiar with, I wasn't sure what her intentions were. And I thought she was just testing me, and had I been honest ("Why yes, I'd love to see them"), she'd think I was a dirty bastard (which I am). And before all you ladies tell me I did the right thing being a gentleman; that was a mistake, I was being stupid, so don't tell me I was being a gentleman. ARRGGHH!!!
She was taken aback some. And a bit embarassed. But we remained friends till the day I left. She gave me a hug and kiss the day I left. I occasionally get an email from her now. But she never asked me again.
Trish, you'll always have a place in my heart...