I'm exhausted, and counting down the final 16 hours before I hand off the pager. I'm nearing the end of my 7-day call.
Admittedly, I'm still sometimes unprepared for this. True, I worked a lot harder as an intern. But, then I knew there was a light at the end of the tunnel, that at the end of the wretched year, things get better. Now I'm still sometimes unnerved that as a non-surgical attending, like today, I started rounds at 6.30 am, and got home at 6.00 pm. This, on top of the 12.15 am, then 2.00 am, then 3.03 am pages. And somehow, they always know how to catch you at the worst of times: pager is quiet for a coupe of hours. You decide to take a shit, or take a bath. Wham, beeper goes crazy.
I do catch myself wondering, if this kind of lifestyle sustainable for the next 20-30 years of a professional career?
Perhaps too heavy of a question, after all in these times one should be lucky to even have a job, especially one with excellent colleagues, support system and reasonable salary, even if the hours are heavier.
I just can't wait to break out my bottle of rum and take a few swigs of hard liquor when I'm done with call.